In my work with many on their spiritual journeys, I have observed several common family and community related themes. One of these  trends is the lack of overall support and acceptance for folks who stand at the crossroads, the door… contemplating their spiritual paths.

At this door, they encounter family members who fail to understand, or deliberately choose to not understand, the spiritual paths of their loved ones. This seems to be particularly true for those practicing African based traditions, or non Christian practices. These individuals may experience certain challenges or judgements based on their decision to practice another religion or spiritual path.

Throughout their families, are individuals that for many reasons, are unable to fully release control of their loved ones journey. They may feel threatened or fearful. They may feel disjointed, as they perceive themselves losing their connection with the individual. They may experience self imposed feelings of “responsibility”, or a need to save them from their “irrational” decision.

I have observed, that for those at the door of transition, these experiences and interactions with doubting individuals may create ambivalence, resulting in delays in evolution and fulfillment of lifes purpose. It forces them to sometimes feel as if they must choose, or practice in secrecy. It creates family and community separation. They remain in a constant state of internal spiritual conflict, which permeates and negatively effects all parts of their lives and relationships. This state creates stagnation and many emotional and physical challenges. They ultimately feel trapped and powerless.

For the above mentioned, I offer some simple reflections to share with family members or loved ones, who struggle with the concept of demonstrating unconditional love and acceptance for those at this juncture.

Sometimes… folks will ask you to join them and support them on their journey.
They may not understand why they need you…
You may not understand where they are going…
It’s ok.
They came through you, but their journey is not yours. 
They walk beside you, but have their distinct path. 
You may have provided the foundation for them spiritually, but now it’s time for them to build on that foundation.
Love them, without conditions, as they do so.
Unconditional love and true acceptance lends to loving someone, even when you don’t fully understand their journey or their mission.
Unconditional love lends to supporting others when they simply require your support.
Please know.. their journey is not for you to understand.
It does need to make sense to you.
They were born alone, with a specific pre- destined path.
A path for them to traverse, in search of their purpose, enlightenment and evolution.
Sometimes, their search is not only for themselves, but for the betterment of their family, ancestral lineage… for their community.
Their search is for the healing of your family and for you.
Trust in them…trust in their journey. Trust in the Divine guidance.
Know that you may be blessed as well.
There may be lessons for you.
Don’t miss out on your blessings because of judgment, fear and doubt.
Open your mind..
Open your heart..
Expand your spiritual horizons…
Love without expecting others to do what you desire, love because they are living the lives they desire.
Love as they are led by Spirit and manifesting their purpose and destiny.
Love them as they fulfill and evolve.”

To those who lack the love and support of others as you embark on your journeys…be patient, trust in the Divine plan, know that your process will eventually bring clarity and Spirit will re-organize and shift your world and those in it, for the betterment of you and your destiny.

Know that you exist in this lifetime, to unapologetically live your lives and manifest all that is uniquely yours. Stay focused and true to your journey. You don’t have to explain, or rationalize. Just live.

The door is open.

Iya Ota Niwé